It feels like spring has sprung here. We’ve seen our first robins, red wing blackbird and turkey vulture. There were a pair each of mallards and hooded merganser ducks paddling in the pond over the weekend. And this year’s sap run is coming to an end with a very decent quantity of syrup.

Perhaps a result of changing season, I’m feeling more motivated.

It’s a welcome change. I have been stalled for a while, which is not a comfortable place for me. I like being productive, but I have made no progress on Ellie’s room makeover or on bringing in some new contracts for work. These are important, but I’m not being disciplined in how I spend my time.

When March Break came along, I gave myself a little break from the blog to try to reset. I like writing, and I like posting every week (schedules and deadlines definitely work for me). But I had lost some mojo So I went back to my word of the year and chose to take a break.

I worked, read, prepared our income taxes, updated my consulting website, and took a small trip for a new client. Ellie and I started going swimming each week and had a fun March Break together. We marked Matt’s 44th birthday, which was hard. I thrifted a great furniture score for Ellie’s room and found some contacts for potential new work.

And my motivation and energy are returning. I’m looking forward to sharing more about Ellie’s new bedroom, starting to work outside and hopefully kicking off patio construction.

For now, here are some of the things I enjoyed this month:

This account has the best parenting–and human being–advice. They also have a new name.

Chef’s Table is my go-to for something easy, inspiring, fun, and uplifting to watch. Mashama Bailey, Lennox Hastie and Tootsie Tomanetz episodes are favourites.

“You should know when enough is enough.” So much inspiration from the first 100 episodes of People I (Mostly) Admire.

Made this pie for Matt’s birthday. Ellie’s verdict: “Daddy would really like this.” Yes, he would.

Ellie is really into non-fiction (or as she calls them, “information books”). This story was a hit and led to a movie, more inspiring animal stories and daily dolphin role playing.

I’m aiming to finish off March with being disciplined. I am putting the finishing touches on some pitches for work, prepping Ellie’s room for painting (more to come), and depending on the weather and my productivity, maybe doing some coop clean-up.

How was March for you? Do you have any tips for being disciplined? Who else works best with a deadline? Has spring arrived where you are?

As I was trying to figure out how to begin this final post of January, I went back and reread my first post of the month–my word of the year.

“I want to remember to choose my attitude, how I feel, how I react, how I spend my time… When I make a choice, there’s an acceptance that I’m letting something go in favour of something else… I’m also choosing to build my life based on what is most important to me–Ellie, family, friends, Cigo, this farm, freedom to enjoy it all.”

There have been some ups and downs this month. Anxiety is not something I struggle with usually, but I’ve had some worries recently. Rereading the words above is comforting. I know what is most important to me. Choosing to let go of other things–including worry and anxiety–makes me focus on the life I want.

So we finished the month on a high. We had a fun day celebrating my nephew’s ninth birthday with family. We have snow finally (not worrying about how long it took to arrive or how long it will stay), and we’ve enjoyed sledding, snow forts and skating. We’ve also made progress on several home projects.

Life is always ups and downs. Choosing to focus on the ups is important to me. As is remembering that I’ll find my way through the downs.

Here are some pick-me-ups from this month:

We are doing 1,000 hours outside again this year. Prioritizing time outside has added so much fun to our lives. We are at 72 hours already.

I am loving wool socks. The Darn Tough brand is a favourite, especially for their lifetime guarantee.

“This farm is and what we do on it is this living breathing thing.”

The land on most farms is degraded. But we can regenerate it.

Let’s share a pick-me-up. What was the best part of January for you? Did you make any tough choices this month?

November turned out pretty well for us. This is remarkable because for the past few years November has been pretty hard. Between the anniversary of Matt’s death, an increase in tantrums (an annual event for some reason), illnesses, the time change, darkness, and cold temperatures, it tends to be a tough month.

We’ve gone through all of the usual hard stuff, but we’ve also had some good times. The month started off with very warm weather, so I blitzed through outdoor projects like the garden and wood chipping. We watched my sister run her personal best marathon to celebrate her 40th birthday.

Then we went straight on to winter with cold and our first (and several more) snows. We embraced it, changed the art in the mudroom and built our first snowmen. Along the way I still managed to squeeze in one more big outdoor project, even if I had to scrape off some icicles first (more on this to come).

Before we look ahead, let’s look back at some of what caught my attention this month:

We hit 1,000 hours outside. This is our second year doing the challenge, and our first time making it to 1,000. I’m really proud that we did it and am excited to start counting again in January.

What happens to your soil in the winter?

Ontario’s premier is opening up greenbelt land for development. Ontario is losing 319 acres of farmland daily. Once farmland is paved it’s gone forever. Farmland produces food. Let’s keep it that way.

Media paywalls and democracy

Ellie and I love variations on the three little pigs story. This Canadian hockey version is a winner.

How did November go for you? Have you transitioned to winter where you are?

Sometimes I think, “Oh I should post this on Instagram.” It could be my morning hike, or a home project, or a beautiful view at the farm.

But I rarely do.

With projects I usually don’t want to take the time to stop (I’ve learned to take pictures, at least most of the time). But mostly, my choice is about focusing on real life. I don’t live my life online. I enjoy the bit I share here on the blog and occasionally social media. But my life exists in the real world, and consciously staying offline keeps me focused on what’s real.

Do you feel a tug between real and virtual?

Here are some of the things that happened both offline and on this month:

What ancient cultures can teach us about the lost art of raising happy, helpful little humans.

A hallucinatory vision of modern hippie-luxe Not a typical interior design description

The Colonizer Playbook A great presentation of a heavy, hard topic.

Visualizing the climate future. I’m not as optimistic as this presentation. What do you think?

We’re ending the month with, of course, Hallowe’en. We’ve carved our pumpkin (and tried the hand mixer hack), made Ellie’s ghost costume, and I expect to kick off November with lots of candy. A different sort of treat arrived at the farm yesterday, on loan from our farmer.

Putting it to work will take up the rest of my week (don’t expect as-it-happens social media coverage, but I’ll share a blog post here once I’m done).

How do you find balance with online and off? Do you have a favourite parenting book or tip? How do you feel about modern hippie-luxe decor? Are you hopeful about climate change? Did your mixer help carve your pumpkin? What’s your favourite Hallowe’en candy?

A groove, productivity, balance–I felt like they all eluded me this month. We’re in a transition of back to school and work. Summer to fall. And I’m still adjusting.

I went into this month with plans and ambitions and long to-do lists. I’m ending the month in much the same place. I’ve done things. Just not as much as I planned to do.

Though there is the done-for-now mudroom.

As usual, we have made time to embrace fun. We started the month with another campout (our last one of the season). There have been lots of hikes, bonfires with my friends and my birthday celebration. Even school has been fun, as Ellie is loving it.

Fun is where we find the most love and joy, so that’s always most important in our lives. Finding my groove and being productive come much farther down the list.

In keeping with my current mood, this month’s links are a mix of dark and light. Some both at the same time.

A friend of a friend died in August of breast cancer. 34 years old. 4 little kids. While she was sick, she started @putakinddeedinyourfeed, and for her birthday earlier this month people did just that. A breast self exam could have saved her life, so make a point to feel yourself on the first.

I’ve followed Tim for a while, so seeing his condo on the cover of House & Home was fun. Also, his living room is beautiful.

I finished this dress for my summer sewing project and am looking forward to making this sweatshirt for the fall.

Is a farm the best place to survive the apocalypse? Some tech billionaires think so (but their apocalypse scenarios are much more selfish and scary than bucolic). Definitely worth a read.

I don’t agree with everything in this article, but it’s an interesting look at farming, food security, and the future.

Are you ready for the second half of your life?

We made our thankful turkey yesterday. It’s a great way to make gratitude tangible and visible. You might want to try it too.

How was September for you? Who else finds transitions hard?

We have done summer well this year.

At first, I was worried about the end of school, work, Ellie, the house, the farm. How was I going to fit it all in? Then I decided we were going to go all in on summer. Everything else would fit in where it could.

Now, at the end of August, I’m looking back at an amazing season. We said yes to pretty much every invitation that came our way. There have been big things like cottage getaways and backyard campouts in the tent. There have also been simple things like fresh fruit and vegetables from the garden, catching frogs at the pond and picnics at various playgrounds.

We have had so much fun.

To be honest, I’m not ready for it to stop. School resumes soon, and I have an ambitious to-do list as we head into the fall. But I’m feeling very nostalgic. Our days are filled with so much love and joy. Ellie is learning so much. We have such an amazing bond. I want to hold onto that.

Time marches on and once a day is done, it’s gone forever. I don’t want to stop time. Life is constantly changing and it’s mostly pretty wonderful. So as I look ahead to the fall, I’m reminding myself of that, and I’m determined to continue to find the love and joy in each day.

Here are some things I’ve read and done over the last little while.

“Believing there is nothing to be done leaves room to become disengaged, apathetic, and inactive… To fight against climate doomism, we can centre hope in our environmental activism.”

“If you ask indigenous peoples… they have no word for wilderness… “What you call ‘wilderness’ we call our back yard.”” As I work out what my role in the environment of the farm should be, I’m learning more about humans working with nature, rather than nature working solely on her own.

Six principles of regenerative agriculture.

Helen Keller on over-consumption, production, business, competition and the opportunity for a happy life. (So many thoughtful, good points in this essay.)

Yay for books set in Canada! Louise Penny and Beverley McLachlin‘s mysteries have been some of my main summer reads.

As August winds down, I’m holding onto summer. We hosted a family barbecue over the weekend–the first time we’ve gotten together with extended family since the pandemic began. It was nice to celebrate with people. I’m thinking another campout this week might be a good way to finish off the month.

How has summer been for you? What’s been the highlight of your summer?

Summer has arrived here on the farm. We watched the hay being cut and baled. We picked strawberries. We caught frogs and minnows at the pond and had bonfires. We laid in the hammock and read in the treehouse. Every day is full of special, simple moments. I do not take this life for granted.

The world is a heavy place. I see extremists with power imposing their vision on society–regardless of the beliefs citizens hold. Whether it’s Russia with the Ukraine, the US with guns and abortion, Canada with Indigenous peoples, or pretty much every society with climate change, people who hold power are using old and extremely narrow thinking to make decisions for today.

Most people look to the future. What do I want to be? How can I do better? We must fight to make sure our countries do the same. Society must progress. We must recognize the wrongs that have been done and correct them. People’s and the planet’s welfare should be a priority. We must treat each other fairly.

This is the world I’m trying to build at the farm. My actions are reading, learning, listening, voting, writing and speaking about my values, being an example for Ellie, respecting and trying to repair the land where I live, and living each day with love and joy as much as I possibly can.

Here are some links from this month that made me laugh, made me think and made me remember.

“We tend to disconnect the digital world from the physical world… But the surveillance that you don’t notice tends to be far more insidious than the one that you do.” Making the case for better digital privacy

I’ve waterskied since I could walk, and it’s a highlight of my summer. This video brought back good memories and made me laugh.

“You better come quick ’cause there’s a hippo in the bathtub. And it’s going down the drain, oh no it’s gone.” Anne Murray. Sharon, Lois & Bram. Raffi. I downloaded my childhood soundtrack for Ellie.

An illuminating, personal look into Julia Child

“The less you disturb the top layer of your soil, the fewer weeds you will have.” Some encouragement and advice for the battle against garden weeds

“One day, you’ll leave this world behind so live a life you will remember.” My father told me.

This week is 4 years since my Dad died. I was having a hard time on Sunday, and The Nights came on at exactly the right time. Life is precious. Don’t let it slip away.

How are you looking to the future? What are you doing to share your values? Where is your refuge? What was the highlight of your month?

I took an unexpected blogging break this month. Between spring on the farm, work projects and a little getaway, a lot of things were taking my attention.

I am still here.

One of the books I read this month was What Comes From Spirit by Richard Wagamese. This quote spoke to me:

Even though I haven’t been writing here on the blog, I have been writing.

It is nice to be back here, sharing my thoughts and some of what we’ve been up to.

The highlight of the month was a getaway with Matt’s family to Manitoulin Island. If you’re looking for a peaceful, private spot surrounded by nature, I highly recommend Rainbow Lodge. Fun fact: it had a previous life in a CBC show.

This chocolate cake was yummy, despite its weird ingredient list.

This book was heart-warming and fairly light. I had to hide it so I could actually do some work, or else I would have read it all at once.

The number of farms in Canada decreased 2% in the last five years. The new Census of Agriculture has lots of data about farming. The Ontario Federation of Agriculture breaks down some of the numbers.

It was lovely to have our little holiday away. However, there is no place like home.

This week I’m hoping to take some time to catch up on projects around the farm and with some family and friends. It’s also election week in Ontario, so I will be voting. If you live in Ontario, I hope you will too. I’m considering winding up the week with our first bonfire of the year–a big part of my summers for the last two years.

How was May for you? What’s keeping you busy these days? Have you read any good books? What’s the weirdest dessert you’ve ever made? What are you focusing on this week?