My thought process went something like this:
“Now that we have the garden, we could really use a composter. I should put it near the kitchen so it’s convenient.”
“While I’m out here, I might as well clear the weeds from the patio.” (I did not ask Baxter to pose. Dude was in a photogenic mood.)
My technique is to take a sharp spade and shove it sharply against the joints between the slabs. If you feel like you might break your wrist, you’re doing it right.
“Now that I’ve cleared the weeds, I might as well see if I can uncover the steps.” (We’ve never seen the steps, and you probably can’t either).
“Holy heck. What was I thinking trying to clear the steps? This ivy is ridiculous!”
“Wow, these steps are much bigger than I thought. And they look amazing.”
“Now where to put the composter? I’ll just clear a little more of this ivy.”
Clunk.
“What was that? Are there more stones under this ivy? Why?”
“Oh hello, husband. You have great timing. Milkshake? Yes, please.”
—Break for Matt’s amazing chocolate peanut butter milkshake—
“Alright, that gave me the fuel I needed. Let’s do what I came out here to do in the first place.”
“Finally done.” (And yes, the dog abandoned me after the milkshake break).
“All this work for a composter? I think I need a shower.”
“But hmmm… what about the patio on the other side of the house?”
“I need to stop thinking so hard.”
Who else has ever over-complicated a simple project? Do you have a composter at your house? Do you have a weedy patio? Any tips on how to do battle with ivy?































































